Bela......

An excruciating day, that it was! I couldn't take it anymore & decided to while away in my University Campus.That was one of the days when I wanted to be with myself....with no one encroaching upon my solitude....completely lonesome,far away from the maddening crowd.

I wondered here & there completely occupied with my own thoughts when suddenly a girl not more than seven spotted me & ran towards me for alms...."Didi,kuch paise de do!".

I paused & perturbed by her repetitive requests , I raucously asked her to go away. The girl silently went away with a crestfallen face & I walked on & on until I reached my home.....

Throughout that night,the seven year old girl came into my mind.I wondered "I shouldn't have been rude to her ,I should have given her something".

The next day when I went to the University,I spotted the girl again.Reluctant she was,to come to me & ask for alms since the previous day i had shooed her away.I called her, hesitantly she came & I gave her a five rupee coin. She gave me a dazzling smile & went away.

After finishing my college chores,I decided to take a round of the University campus because it relieved me from my inner angst,sedated the turmoil that I was going through.I went to a park nearby & sat on an old wrought iron bench. I could feel the loneliness that was tormenting me when again I saw the 7 year old girl running behind a cute little puppy that was frisking around.Seeing me,she at once came to me & again bedazzled me with her warm smile & before she could utter a word, I politely interrupted..."Bacche,abhi mere paas kuch bhi nahi hain!" Her smile turned into a broad grin & she sat on the bench by my side.

I asked her, her name & she vehemently replied "Bela...." .That was for the first time ,I could have a complete glimpse of hers,from head to toe.She was a thin undernourished kid,all draped in an off-white tarnished frock.Her hair braided in two plots,tied neatly with a cute red ribbon & her toe nails painted pink. She was all engrossed with the stray pup & she smiled all along......

The girl had"something" in her that was too poignant to stay unnoticed.

I asked her about her family & she said that she had 5 sisters & a baby brother.She further added (& in her voice, a subtle numbness was palpable) that her father goes to a toddy shop nearby & in a drunken state beats his wife.She told that her mother washes utensils in the neighboring houses & often coughs blood.....

I was moved by her dire state & even more addled to see the way she always smiles ,even after being wrecked by the destiny.May be Bela was too small to understand the intricacies of life or may be she was way too mature !

She then added that neither she nor her sisters have ever been to a school.When I asked her if she wanted to study,pat came her reply "Haan, didi, main parhna chahti hoon!"

Saying these, she ran after the pup & I was deeply awestruck.

The following days,i continued to go to the park & always expected Bela's presence.Seeing me,Bela would gleefully come to me without any expectation of alms . I would merrily pull her cheeks & give her a candy. Once she said "Didi, aap bahot acche ho!" & hearing this I gave her an unsettling peck on her cheeks.

I told Bela that I would teach her & hearing this ,her happiness knew no bounds.Contented my soul was,since I made an endeavor to bring a small but a significant change in Bela's life but destiny had something else en- stored for me.....

"Your grandpa has passed away" said the shaky voice. I hung up the phone & I succumbed to a state of overwhelming distress. On the very next day,I had to catch up the train to my Grandpa's house.

In this situation of utter confusion & distress,I had completely forgotten about Bela but when I was going to the railway station,i asked the autowaalaah to take me to the same old park. Fortunately, I saw Bela, called her & said "Listen, Bela! I have to go out of station.My Grandpa is no more.I will come back after some days & then shall start your lessons"

Hearing this, a teary-eyed Bela said "Didi!Aap jaldi aana" & I hugged her......

I spent almost a month at my grandpa's place.I was so attached to him that I could never (not even in my wildest imaginations) imagine that he would part-away from me.I regretted not being with him during the last days of his life.

After a month,when I came back to my city,I tried to get back to normalcy.I said to myself " Life is a series of strange qualities.It has nothing constant except for the fact that it just moves on."

Bela came across my mind & so did my promise that I had made to her......the promise that I would educate her......I bought new note-books & pencils for Bela & went to the park.

I ransacked every nook & corner but couldn't find Bela anywhere.I wondered if she had left the place.I asked the kiosk owners & the street vendors about Bela but in vain.I asked the street kids about Bela's whereabouts & they pointed at a thatched,dilapidated hut,validating it as "Bela ka ghar".

I went inside & there I spotted a malnourished girl may be a little older than Bela & asked her "Bela,yahi rehti hain?" She nodded & called her "Amma". Her stick-thin mother came from inside & in her hoarse voice asked me "Kya Hain?"

I joined my hands & said "Namaste! Bela kaha hain?" & no sooner did she hear this than she thumped on the floor & started bowling "Bela, marr gayi!" ["Bela is no more"] .

I could not believe my ears & was taken aback. I couldn't imagine a young frolicking girl lying in eternal sleep! She went on saying that 15 days earlier ,Bela's father had brutally beaten her for a minor fault & he kept her outside the hut for the whole night.That night,it had been raining cats & dogs & all through the night,Bela cried incessantly & completely drenched,she caught cold & shivered to death.

Calming down after a while, she asked a shocked me "Aap kaun ho?" Anguished with not even a single word coming out of my mouth , I blurted....."Err....m....main Bela kk.....ki didi"....

The girl who was standing by her amma's side ,on hearing this went inside & brought a slate on which it was boldly written "DIDI" (in Hindi) ....She handed over the slate to me & said "Bela had learnt to write this & she was so excited to show it to you"

I flustered & gazed at the slate for a moment.Tears rolled down my cheeks like an unbroken stream......I took the slate & walked back into the pensive lanes of my life!